Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
