There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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