So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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