This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
