Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Randomize
