New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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