you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
