I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
