guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I supernannyed him into submission
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
