He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
