aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
All I want is dick and wine.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
