i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
