yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
