It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
