I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
