Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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