Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
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