They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
