Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up�
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Randomize
