guys are only as good as the porn they watch
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
