we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
