Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
did i walk over a car last night?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
