i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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