Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize