Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
