dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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