I wannas sexs uuuuu
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
