why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
