I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Randomize
