I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize
