She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
3pm strippers are depressing
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
