so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
she told me i tasted like america
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
