I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
You are the jesus of drinking
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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