i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
