About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
