it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
