Me. At least after what I've been through.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
