Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Randomize
