i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
