I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
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