your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
