What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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