He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
