wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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