I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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