I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
