why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
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