Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
