Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
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