i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
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